SportsCrack Blog

Monday, January 31, 2011

HERSCHEL WALKER IS STILL A BAD ASS MOFO



To this day I still think Herschel Walker is the greatest college football player of all-time. The guy was a beast at Georgia and could have easily won 3 Heismans if the voters voted like they do today (back then freshmen and sophomores were frowned upon by Heisman voters).

Herschel is now 48 years old and still kicking ass. Now he is just doing it in MMA against guys half his age. I'm not a huge fan of the mixed martial arts/ultimate fighting stuff but I did watch Herschel whoop some ass Saturday night on Showtime. You could tell he still does his 1000 push ups a day and he claims last year he ran a 4.4 40 yard dash. Is there any doubt Herschel could play in the NFL as a fullback? I bet he could be a killer linebacker. If he can survive MMA at 48 I think he could probably still cut it in the NFL.

If the Atlanta Falcons want to create some more buzz for next season I suggest they invite him to tryouts. The local legend already has a cult following and I wouldn't mind seeing him wear the NFL's version of the red and black in 2011.

What do you think about Herschel? Could he play in the NFL at the age of 48?

JUST ANOTHER BLAKE GRIFFIN HIGHLIGHT



Seriously what the fuck is this guy on? Every single night he has a new highlight. You know Blake Griffin is young enough to be Michael Jordan's long lost son. Just saying.


Saturday, January 29, 2011

JOSH SMITH WITH THE ALLEY-OOP OVER THE KNICKS



I could hear Josh Smith whisper to all the d-bag Knicks fans in attendance last night at the Highlight Factory. You know what he said?

"GO FUCK YOURSELF NEW YORK!"

Friday, January 28, 2011

Snow Removal Fail



I do find it kind of humorous all the people who live up north bitching about the weather on Facebook. Jesus, fucking move already if you are sick of the snow. It's fucking January and you live in a cold weather city. You have no right to bitch about the snow or delays or any of that shit. There is a reason why I moved back to the South. The women are hotter and it doesn't snow 3-4 months a year.

By the way awesome form by the guy while falling off the roof. He could have killed himself but he didn't. He shrugged and laughed it off. Jay Cutler would still be crying like the little bitch he is. Now excuse me while I go get a band aid for this paper cut. It's never a good idea to flip pages with your cock.

Ray Drew calls out the rest of the "Dream Team"


I have to give props to Chip Towers who always puts together great news when it comes to college recruiting. You can check him out over at the AJC writing almost daily on the college football recruiting blog. I shared some insider information about a week ago here and I wanted to point out something Ray Drew said.

“I just want to say to Jay (Jay Rome) at the end of his announcement, I heard your call,” Drew said. “And now I’ve given an answer. Isaiah Crowell, we’re waiting on you; Antonio Richardson, we’re waiting on you; John Jenkins, we’re waiting on you; and Jeoffrey Pagan, we’re waiting on you. Come join what we’re putting together, the Dream Team. But remember, a dream is only a dream until you make it reality. So I’m calling you out on this one. I hope you’re not afraid to be thrown into the fire. I hope you’re not afraid to be the ones to make the change.”

CMR is doing a great job of putting together a true "Dream Team". There's no doubt that this may be the most prolific class the Bulldawgs have ever seen. I don't care who you're a fan of, from top to bottom this class has the depth and the quality to push UGA back to the National Championship caliber team we are used to seeing. Congrats on picking the Dawgs Rev Drew. I'm proud to see not only the talent, but the caliber of recruits Coach Mark Richt and Coach Mike Bobo are putting on campus. GOOOOOOOOOOOO DAWGS! SIC EM!!! WOOF WOOF WOOF!!!

ARIZONA'S DERRICK WILLIAMS WITH THE ALLEY OOP TOMAHAWK DUNK



Dunk you very much Derrick Williams! Talk about getting some fucking sky astronaut. Williams took the alley oop pass from Kevin Parrom and did his best Blake Griffin impression. I'm almost positive ESPN's Rece Davis jizzed in his pants during this highlight. I know I did.

Video via ExtraMustard

A GOOD BAR JOKE TO BREAK THE ICE


A Virginia State trooper pulled a car over on I-64 about 2 miles south of the Virginia/West Virginia State line..

When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Beckley, WV to do a show at the Shrine Circus. He didn't want to be late.

The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn't give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.

The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them.

The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him.

While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the patrol car. A drunken good old boy from West Virginia got out, watched the performance briefly, then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The trooper observed him and went over to the patrol car and opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, "You might as well take my ass to jail, because there ain't no way I can pass that test."

TRACY MORGAN CALLS SARAH PALIN "GOOD MASTURBATION MATERIAL" ON TNT LAST NIGHT



You gotta love the complete honesty of Tracy Morgan. Morgan never misses a chance at saying something outlandish which in this case is pretty fucking funny. I love Charles Barkley's shit eating grin too when he says it. Ernie Johnson looks like he just shit himself.

Video via TheBigLead

RAY DREW AKA "PASTOR OF DISASTER" PICKS UGA


In what turned out to be the least shocking in regards to recruiting announcements Ray Drew, the 6-ft-5 250 lb defensive end from Thomasville, picked the heavily favored Georgia Bulldogs over Auburn and LSU. Just last week Drew promised to "shock the world" on Facebook with his announcement but in the end it turned out exactly like a M Night Shyamalan film: boring and predictable.

Drew is a licensed minister who preaches in churches after destroying his opponents on the gridiron. I call him the "Pastor of Disaster" because he is a consensus 5 star recruit who is ranked the #1 weakside defensive end by Rivals.com and #2 by ESPN. He is projected to play more of an OLB role at Georgia and should have a chance to compete for a starting position right away with the early departure of Justin Houston to the NFL Draft.

Drew is another member of the "Dream Team" to join the 2011 class. UGA has already landed Jay Rome, Malcolm Mitchell, Xzavier Ward, Sterling Bailey, Damian Swann and are looking to close out with 5 star tailback Isaiah Crowell.

Mark Richt is doing a hell of a job recruiting for a program coming off two disastrous seasons.

Here are some highlights of the "Pastor of Disaster"....

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Sterling Bailey embodies what we strive for...

Image courtesy of accessnorthga.com

With all the negative comments on recruiting and recent problems of kids getting arrested, I have to repost this. Thanks to mountaindewman over on Scout.com's UGA fan boards for sharing this email. As if Sterling Bailey wasn't enough of a beast on the field, he is truly a man among boys off of the field. I'm already proud of this future Dawg!

I don't get into the recruiting fray too much, but I did receive an email forwarded to me about Sterling Bailey. The email is from the Rabun County girls basketball coach to the FCA director at East Hall, which is Sterling Bailey's high school.

Just wanted my fellow dawg posters to see what kind of young man we're getting in Sterling Bailey.
Enjoy.

Jason,

Just wanted to share with you an event that took place Friday night in Rabun County. East Hall and Rabun County were locked in a region battle when something unbelievable happened. A Rabun County player was seriously injured when he landed awkwardly. It quickly became apparent that he had suffered a compound leg fracture. As his family gathered around him, so did his coaching staff as well as East Hall Coach Joe Dix. Several minutes went by as they waited for the paramedics to arrive. As the player grew restless and time seemed to creep by, Sterling Bailey, an East Hall basketball player, walked over and asked the family if he could pray for the injured player. As he knelt down to pray, both teams came together to surround the player and his family. As the crowd began to see what was happening, the packed gym fell silent. You could seriously hear a pin drop. Sterling led hundreds in a prayer that could be heard from anywhere in that huge gym. Even the paramedics, who arrived at the beginning of the prayer, stopped in their tracks and joined in. When he finished praying, the entire gym closed it out with a resounding AMEN followed by an ovation that would make you think someone had hit a game winning shot. The injured player's family embraced Sterling and thanked him for his wonderful and Godly gesture. I had the honor of witnessing this amazing event and will never forget it. I am overjoyed to see our athletes doing exactly what God calls them to do.

I shared this with some of our deacon ministers this morning. One was actually David Baston and he said I needed to share this with you so could share with the rest of the FCA leadership. Blessings!

Gary Gaddy

East Hall Girls Basketball

Jeremiah 29:11

You Wanted It, You Got It


Here at SportsCrack, you could say we are brash, you could say we don't care and you'd be right, but we do have some kind of heart and it shows. After numerous, okay, maybe just a few, requests for a mail bag, here it is. Email me @ mcpeters@sportscrack.com or Matt @ matt@sportscrack.com and get in our heads. We'll be doing this weekly on Thursdays and posting answers on Tuesdays. Keep it juicy and don't worry, we won't hold back.

"So, in closing, I'd like to give big ups to God, Buddha, L. Ron, whoever. Hell, maybe I just need to thank me. If there's one thing I've learned through all my adventures and conquests, it's that some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. I'm not trying to sound cocky or full of myself, but Kenny Powers has a sneaking suspicion that no matter what comes his way he will always be great. Because that's just the way shit works sometimes. This has been based on a true story. The motherfuckin' end." - Kenny Powers

What's the Word?

Image Courtesy of georgiadogs.com

It's almost Friday CrackHeadz and National Signing Day is getting closer and closer. Here's the latest from what I can gather for UGA.

Ray Drew, according to Chip Towers of the AJC has reportedly canceled all in home visits this week. Further, Chip reports that Isaiah Crowell will not be visiting Auburn this weekend. Gotta love that news if you're a Dawgs fan!

Drew, by the way, said it was he, not the college teams recruiting him, who canceled all the in-home visits scheduled for this week. Clemson, Auburn and LSU were all due in his Thomasville home this week, but Drew said he asked them not to come.

“I needed this week just to breathe a little bit and clear my mind,” the 6-foot-5, 250-pound defensive end said. “I didn’t want to talk to any more coaches.”

Drew is going to announce his decision Friday morning at 10 a.m. at Thomas County Central High School. That has required a lot of his time to get ready. Not only has he had to figure out who he’s going to pick — he already knows, by the way — and how he’s going to do it, but he also is having to juggle his academic schedule. He’s having to take one test today that was scheduled for Friday so he can get it out of the way.

“I’m ready to get it out and get it over with,” he said.

Drew offered no hints or intentional deflections were provided by Drew this time. He said will talk about finalists Auburn, Clemson, Georgia, LSU and Miami on Friday. But there will be no hat ceremony, he said. “Only the one I’m going to put on my head when I say where I’m going.

Also, word on the street is that Jeoffrey Pagan has decommitted from Clemson and that Clemson will not be sending scholarship paperwork to either Pagan nor Ray Drew. Even the Clemson insiders over at Scout.com think that Pagan will probably sign with UGA. I'm hearing that UGA staff is visiting both Crowell and John Jenkins this week before the dead period and that at least one UGA staffer will be at the Drew press conference on Friday.

Finally, I'm still hearing things are looking good for the Dawgs with Kent Turene and Antonio Richardson. While Turene remains a USC commit, several experts tend to think UGA has a real shot with him, especially if Pagan commits. Richardson may be a bit of a stretch, but stranger things have happened and if the UGA staff is still on him this hard and this late, there has to be a chance and there has to be room. It's going to be an interesting week for the Dawgs, but look for them to finish strong thanks to excellent recruiting by Coach Bobo, yes Coach Bobo, and Coach Richt. The Dawgs should be looking at a top 3 class by the time all is said and done. It's still great to be a Dawg folks!



TV HOST LIKES TO HAVE A HANDS-ON EXPERIENCE



Seriously I was just waiting for her to start motorboating. If I didn't flunk Spanish all those years I would interpret what exactly they were saying but it wouldn't be as sexy as just not knowing. You know what I'm saying. Sometimes the mystery of a foreign language while some broad gropes on boobs is something I don't want spoiled by real English words. Oh and by the way a guy would never get away with this shit on camera.

Video via Ebaum's World

PARTY TABLE OF FAIL



How come I never get invited to parties like this? It must be because I tend to strip down and piss on everyone when I get drunk. Apparently I was raised in much more liberal household. Props go out to her finishing the shot by the way. She's marriage material.

Video via Ebaum's World

NOTRE DAME RELEASES OFFICIAL FIFTH-YEAR SENIOR LIST


Taylor Dever-Starting right tackle who's play improved greatly last season. He will again be the starter at right tackle in what should be an excellent line in 2011.

Gary Gray-Top cornerback on the team and a top five corner in the nation. Gray is one of the best tacklers from the corner position and was a huge reason why the Notre Dame defense was so greatly improved in 2010. Should be an eventual starter in the NFL.

Andrew Nuss-Backup to Taylor Dever at offensive tackle. Provides much needed depth and experience for the Irish line.

Mike Ragone-Backup tight end to Tyler Eifert. Ragone has battled injuries since high school but when he plays he is the best blocking tight end. Was a must get since Kyle Rudolph left early for the NFL.

David Ruffer-Finalist for the Lou Groza Award this past season and should be on scholarship in 2011. One could argue that Ruffer was the MVP of the team. A fan favorite even though NBC butchers his name.

Harrison Smith-Starting safety who had an excellent 2010. He has transformed himself into one of the best safeties in the nation. Had a game saving pick vs. USC at the end of the game and also had 3 picks in the bowl game vs. Miami. Named a captain along with Michael Floyd for 2011.

From what I see on paper only offensive lineman Matt Romine and defensive lineman Emeka Nwankwo were not asked back for 5th years. As of now with the 23 incoming recruits and the 5 fifth-years back Notre Dame has a full roster of 85. Notre Dame doesn't "gray-shirt" like the SEC schools do so if they take on anymore recruits before signing day or a transfer like Prestwood from FSU then somebody would have to transfer out of the Notre Dame program who is currently on the scholarship chart. My money on a possible transfer out would be a QB, defensive lineman, or kicker.

RB SAVON HUGGINS ELIMINATES NOTRE DAME, WILL PICK BETWEEN UNC AND RUTGERS TOMORROW


It's starting to look like Notre Dame will not be getting a tailback in this recruiting class with recent news that RB Savon Huggins has eliminated the Irish and will choose between North Carolina and Rutgers tomorrow. Huggins is a definite game changer who reminds me a lot of Knowshon Moreno when he came out of high school. He has the same build, lateral quickness, and speed. He is currently ranked the #7 back in the nation and is the #1 recruit out of New Jersey. Right now if I had to bet on where he lands I think the good money is on home state Rutgers. Head coach Greg Schiano is selling him on the pro-style offense they run and Huggins as his Ray Rice 2.0.

I was hoping Notre Dame would land Huggins because with the graduations of Armando Allen and Robert Hughes they only have Cierre Wood and Jonas Gray with any experience coming back. Wood could have a monster season in 2011 as the feature back and bolt for the NFL. Plus injuries always happen so if there is one position the Irish will be recruiting hard in 2011 it will be tailback. Barry Sanders Jr. is the top target among the juniors.

Here are some of Huggins highlights...

VLADIMIR GUERRERO AN ORIOLE? ME LIKEY


According to Ken Rosenthal of Fox Sports the Baltimore Orioles have made free agent Vladimir Guerrero an offer. Supposedly it's a one year deal with a range of $3-5 million. Fuck yeah!

Vlad is coming off another solid season of 29 homers and 100 plus RBI's at Texas. He would be perfect for the Orioles lineup with him as the full-time DH and putting Luke Scott in LF while Felix Pie and Nolan Reimold battle it out for the 4th OF spot.

Check out this lineup if Vlad does sign with the O's:

Brian Roberts, S (2B)
Nick Markakis, L (RF)
Derrek Lee, R (1B)
Vlad Guerrero, R (DH)
Luke Scott, L (LF)
Mark Reynolds, R (3B)
Adam Jones, R (CF)
Matt Wieters, S (C)
J.J. Hardy, R (SS)

Their lineup would have serious pop and a decent balance of lefties, righties, and switch hitters. With the Blue Jays and the Rays both taking serious steps back this offseason it wouldn't be all too shocking to see the Orioles finish 3rd in the AL East. They would at least be exciting to watch from an offensive standpoint.

USC LOSES ANOTHER PLAYER, SNOOP DOGG IS OFFICIALLY NOTRE DAME



The defections keep coming from the USC Trojans football program. Once the sanctions hit you knew players would be jumping ship but now they have lost one of their biggest celebrities in rapper Snoop Dogg. Snoop-a-loop was spotted last night in South Bend with a Michael Floyd jersey and flashing "O" line signs with offensive tackles Mike Golic Jr. and Taylor Dever. By next week expect to see Will Ferrell wearing a Manti Te'o jersey while filming his next movie. Poor USC.

GIL MECHE QUITS BASEBALL, SAYS "I DON'T DESERVE $12 MILLION"


Wait a god damn second. That headline can't be right! There is no way an athlete would just walk away from $12 million.

Actually one did. His name is Gil Meche and instead of reporting to Kansas City Royals spring training in a couple of weeks he has decided to retire and essentially walk away from $12 million guaranteed if he just sat his ass on the bench.

“When I signed my contract, my main goal was to earn it,” Meche told the paper from his temporary home in Lafayette, La. “Once I started to realize I wasn’t earning my money, I felt bad. I was making a crazy amount of money for not even pitching. Honestly, I didn’t feel like I deserved it. I didn’t want to have those feelings again.”

“This isn’t about being a hero — that’s not even close to what it’s about,” Meche said. “It’s just me getting back to a point in my life where I’m comfortable. Making that amount of money from a team that’s already given me over $40 million for my life and for my kids, it just wasn’t the right thing to do.”


Talk about receiving a big ole slice of humble pie. All professional athletes are in fact NOT greedy pricks. I'm not going to lie and say I would do the same thing Meche did. I sure as hell would want the rest of my money because the contract stated it. But Meche isn't a dick like myself. He probably saves kids in Africa and donates money to shelters in his spare time while I sucker punch the homeless and run away with their change. My Durango can't pay for gas itself people.

HT to Dave

FSU'S JORDAN PRESTWOOD TO TRANSFER TO NOTRE DAME?


What is the world coming to when Notre Dame is stealing recruits from FSU? Florida high school kids no less!

The hot rumor going around the forums lately is current FSU early enrollee offensive tackle Jordan Prestwood (committed to ND before signing with FSU) is not happy in Tallahassee and is looking to transfer to Notre Dame in the summer. Prestwood and Notre Dame defensive end Aaron Lynch are good friends and went on the same paths during their recruiting trips. Both committed to Notre Dame last summer only to decommit in October. Both took a couple of days before deciding to go to FSU. As we all know Lynch switched back to Notre Dame right after the US Army All-American Game after he felt he was lied to by FSU coaches. If Prestwood does transfer to Notre Dame he would have to sit out a year due to NCAA regulations regarding transfers.

Another college football story going around is USC Trojan WR Brice Butler is looking to transfer. Butler was a 4 star recruit coming out of Georgia who has never blossomed into the star he was made out to be. Since USC is on probation Butler can transfer and not have to sit out a year. It's looking like Georgia or FSU could get Butler. The Bulldogs could use Butler immediately with the departure of AJ Green to the draft.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

INTERESTED EH?



I have no more confidential information on the Chipper Jones divorce so stop asking. Enjoy these!

CHIPPER JONES HEADED FOR DIVORCE



According to an Atlanta Braves insider Chipper Jones aka Larry is headed for a divorce with his second wife Sharon Logonov (pictured above and not the Hooters waitress you were thinking of).

Chipper is in the final year of his contract and unfortunately his career too. The future Hall-of-Famer met his soon to be ex Sharon at a bar in Orlando just a couple of month after separating from his first wife, Karin. This was just a few months after Chipper got busted with having a son out of wedlock named Matthew (damn, I'm not the same one) whom he had an affair with an absolutely gorgeous Hooters waitress (she had 3 front teeth).

Chipper and his wife Sharon separate with three sons consummated (Larry Wayne III (Trey), Tristen (obviously a Legends of the Falls fan), and Shea (yep, world famous New York ballpark)) to run amok in the wild. Prayers go out to Chipper(Larry) and his family.

Not a huge country fan, but Tanner Strickland is rocking out!

I don't care what anyone says, Tanner Strickland might be my new hero. The ex-UGA lineman is a pretty good guitar player and let's be honest, Athens is amazing. Check out TStrick54 channel on YouTube for more of Tanner's thoughts and videos. He's a good guy and a DGD!

THE BACHELOR'S MICHELLE MONEY HAD AN AFFAIR WITH CARLOS BOOZER



Don't act like you haven't been watching this shit either. This crazy broad named Michelle Money who has been competing for the Bachelor's Brad Womack's junk had an affair with current Chicago Bulls power forward Carlos Boozer while he was still married. According to TheBigLead Boozer and Michelle met back in Salt Lake City when Boozer was playing for the Jazz. She told Life & Style Magazine: “Yes, I was in a relationship with Carlos while he was still married. What I did was wrong!”

Boozer has since gotten a divorce from his wife and Michelle is the crazy lady who has told the nation she will be the girl for Brad Womack. In other words she is a hunter. I know what you are thinking right? Fucking Hot! But before you think that you have to visualize what exactly Boozer looks like. He's not exactly attractive in a traditional way.



Here is a recent scene where her and Womack get their panties wet repelling down a skyscraper. Typical first date.

MINI GOLF PUTT-PUTT SHOT SENT FROM GOD



I mean what are the chances this asshole does it again? Probably a million-to-one odds. I didn't even realize there were miniature putt-putt courses around anymore. I wonder if these guys were playing a beer a hole with their ghost shots? If so it would make the shot even more impressive. The back 9 can get a little hazy when you pass out with piss all over yourself. Not that that has ever happened to me. Don't listen to my sponsor. He's a fucking dick.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Yooooooooo... let's talk recruiting


What's up crackers?!?!? Yeah, you know you love it...

I try not to get too much into recruiting, but there are some juicy stories leading up to NSD, that's National Signing Day in case you happen to read this sports blog and you also like men. Since I'm a UGA grad and pretty partial, I figured I update you guys with some of the most recent news that I've learned.

Take this for what it is, all recruiting is truly speculation. No one knows what a 17 or 18 year old kid will do or what truly makes him tick, however, I've been hearing a lot lately from some pretty reliable sources. As of now, there are approximately 5 slots available in this recruiting cycle, here's how they are going to fill out.

Friday, Ray Drew will announce for UGA. The nation's #1 DE has been toying with grown adults who are all too creepy into following the recruiting process and has been screaming everything but UGA as of late. Word is he committed two weeks ago and he was calling Antonio Richardson to recruit him to UGA as well over the weekend. Anyone want to guess who made a surprise visit to UGA last weekend?!?!? Antonio Richardson... and anyone know where Drew was when he was supposedly making these calls?!?!?... Clemson... Seems like Mr. Drew is having his fun with the recruiting process so let him. The kid is a beast. More on Richardson shortly.

Word from a reliable source who I will not name, Johnathan Jenkins, and Kent Turene have silent committed to UGA as of last weekend. Jenkins has been thought to have been leaning to UGA for weeks. Him and Drew are going to look good on the line together. Turene loved Athens and trust me, he's wanted to fill an immediate need in depth for ILB and OLB. This would be a huge coup for UGA considering Turene has been a USC committ for a while now.

The fourth spot left with come down to NSD, but yes, Isaiah Crowell will be a Dawg. In fact, what I've heard is that Crowell has been a silent commit for quite a while. Anyone remember last year when UGA, running back U itself, got spurned by three big time running backs?!? Not saying Isaiah Crowell had part in that, but I'd bet his addition to this years class scared off a few backs and I can tell you him and Ken Malcome are going to look good in the UGA backfield for a few years to come.

The fifth spot is going to be a bit of a surprise, but hell, I'll spoil it. Xzavier Dickson will be a Dawg. While he may not play immediately, he will be a solid back up to Jenkins and to Geathers, who trust me, will factor in the Dawgs game plan.

As promised, more on Richardson, from what I hear, Xzavier Ward has been talked to about grey shirting this year if Antonio Richardson will in fact accept the offer to come to UGA. I don't think this is likely, not because I haven't heard that Richardson is in fact going to switch, take that Da'Rick Rogers and UT, but because I've heard there may be a VC (verbal commit) or two who may not qualify and will be a sign and follow to Georgia Military College or Hargrave.

Again, take this for what it is, but the next week and a day is going to be interesting. "I said it's GREAT to be a GEORGIA BULLDOG!"

YOUR TUESDAY LUNCH VIEWING PLEASURE: ATLANTA THRASHERS ICE GIRLS



You can check out the full gallery at SI.com but needless to say the Atlanta Thrashers Ice Girls have been the most exciting thing to happen to the franchise since Kovy was skating. In the past week they have gone on an extended losing streak and their dipshit ownership group called the Atlanta Spirit have been trying to sell the Thrashers since 2005 while putting an inferior product on the ice. If they want to get more fans down to Philips Arena I would suggest better players, new ownership, and more of the Ice Girls...












Monday, January 24, 2011

JAIME EDMONDSON IN A TIGHT CAROLINA PANTHERS OUTFIT



Jaime Edmondson is a Playboy Playmate who in her spare time loves to wear Carolina Panthers clothing with awesome bottom cleavage showing. When did bottom cleavage go out of style? Back in the 80's every poster and/or hair band video had bottom cleavage. Hopefully Edmondson is bringing it back. It's a lost art form.

Video via Extra Mustard

OHIO STATE #1 IN BASKETBALL, DEAD LAST IN MILEY CYRUS KARAOKE



Buckeye hoops players Jon Diebler, Aaron Craft, and Jared Sullinger might want to stop with the Miley Cyrus songs. If you are going to do karaoke at least do it right. Pick a Justin Bieber song. Fucking amateurs.

Video HT via BarStoolSports

CUTLER TORE HIS MCL YESTERDAY (CORRECTION: SPRAINED VAGINA)


It looks like Jay Cutler really was injured. Cutler suffered a dislocated labia. No wait a second. He suffered a torn medial collateral ligament (MCL) in his left knee during the second quarter according to the Chicago Sun-Times. This is great news for all the Chicago Bears fans who burned his jersey yesterday. It doesn't mean he just flat out sucks. His injury helped his overall shittiness yesterday and his 33 QB rating. Brett Favre would have stayed in, thrown 4 picks, and sent dong shots while getting X-rays to at least 5 masseuses. Cutler is such a pussy!

CORRECTION: Cutler did not tear his MCL according to Lovie Smith. He does in fact have a sprained ego and has a pouty face. Poor guy.

THE JAY QUITLER 6 SHIRT



This non licensed t-shirt is a great parody gift for any Chicago, Denver, or football fan in general out there. Everyone knew Quitler was soft before yesterday. Now you can wear it. Limited supplies so order your shirt today.


QUITLER 6 SHIRT for only $17

THE BJ RAJI "FREEZER" DANCE



I gotta give it up for the former Boston College star. He is making big plays in the NFL and is the one of the main reasons why Green Bay is in the Super Bowl. His nickname is "The Freezer" and the big guy unleashed his dance moves yesterday in Chicago.

WAKE UP MONDAY TO BROOKLYN DECKER

FOOTBALL PLAYERS TEAR UP JAY CUTLER ON TWITTER


If you were thinking it was only going to be the media and the fans giving Jay Cutler aka Quitler a hard time over his leaving the NFC Championship with a "knee injury" then you thought wrong. Some NFL players went on Twitter yesterday to voice their displeasure over Cutler and if his heart is really into the game.

Bucs linebacker Derrick Brooks: HEY there is no medicine for a guy with no guts and heart

Jaguars running back Maurice Jones Drew: Hey I think the urban meyer rule is effect right now... When the going gets tough........QUIT..

Cardinals safety Kerry Rhodes: Cmon cutler u have to come back. This is the NFC championship if u didn't know!

Cardinals defensive lineman Darnell Dockett: Jay Cutler thinking out loud* mannn I'm glad he threw that pic to #90 cuz I did not want to get blame for this Lost!

Deion Sanders: Folks i never question a players injury but i do question a players heart. Truth

Mark Schlereth: As a guy how had 20 knee surgeries you'd have to drag me out on a stretcher to Leave a championship game!



Primetime basically said the Tin Man has more heart than Quitler. Ouch! It's pretty harsh to get called out by a guy who went out of his way to avoid tackling.



Bears fans love them some Jay Cutler. Take a look....

RASHARD MENDENHALL GIVES BIG BEN SOME OF HIS OWN MEDICINE



Looks like sexual assault to me. Rapelisberger is now in his third Super Bowl and now we can listen for two weeks of endless talk about how he has redeemed himself and he has a chance to put himself in the upper echelon of NFL greats with three rings. It's a feel good story for Big Ben minus the you know, actually girls he raped. Right now Vegas has the early line at -2.5 in favor of Green Bay. If the Packers played like they did yesterday I don't see them winning. Aaron Rodgers had a bad game and the defense and Jay Quitler bailed him out. At this moment I think I got to take the Steelers as the underdog. Don't worry I got 13 days to change my mind.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

MARK SANCHEZ WIPES HIS BOOGERS ON MARK BRUNELL



Classy move there Sanchise.

AFC/NFC CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS




GREEN BAY(-4) AT CHICAGO
Before the season started I took the Packers to win the NFC and meet the Ravens in the Super Bowl. Obviously only half of my prediction will come true. Jay Cuntler will throw at least two costly picks and the people's champion Aaron Rodgers will have another huge game. I know the Bears are the home team and they are tough to beat at Soldier Field but I don't see Brian Urlacher and Julius Peppers being huge factors today and the Packers will roll up 400 yards of total offense. Devin Hester could change this prediction with one punt return but right now I have a good feeling the Packers will roll in this one.

Prediction: Packers 27 Bears 17

NEW YORK JETS(+4) AT PITTSBURGH
I know the Pittsburgh Steelers are America's Team (sorry Dallas, you lost your title) but who honestly can root for them with Ben Rapelisberger as their leader? The Jets come in with road victories over New England and Indy so I don't think they will be intimidated by Heinz Field. With all the bravado Rex Ryan brings to this game you can't just ignore what makes the Jets successful: their running game and most importantly their defense. Today I think the Jets are going to have a hard time running the ball with Shonn Greene and Tomlinson toughing out 1-3 yard gains against a strong Jet's run defense. If the Jets are going to win they are going to need a huge game from Mark Sanchez. As much as I want the Jets to win because I can't stand the Steelers I just can't take the Jets over Pittsburgh. But I do like the Jets to beat the spread in a close one.

Prediction: Steelers 21 Jets 19

Friday, January 21, 2011

RON SWANSON REVEALS THE SWANSON PYRAMID OF GREATNESS



Bobby Knight has nothing on Park and Recreation's Ron Swanson. The guy is an American Icon. In fact I think he sits right above Bill Belichick, Coach K, and Phil Jackson as an upper tier head coach. Coach K lives in the apartment below Swanson's penthouse is what I'm saying. He can smell his fecal matter oozing out in all it's glory. The only loss on Swanson's record was due to horrible officiating. Don't believe well then take a look. Tom the Ref clearly had money on the blue team.



Ripoff of TV Clips direct from TheBigLead

UGA'S "DREAM TEAM" STILL ALIVE WITH COMMITMENTS FROM JAY ROME AND MALCOLM MITCHELL


The Georgia Bulldogs may not be winning many battles on the football field the past two seasons but the recruiting wars have been going their way. Yesterday the Dawgs picked up two commitments in Valdosta high school teammates Jay Rome (#4 tight end in the country) and Malcolm Mitchell (#1 cornerback in the country) who both picked UGA over Alabama.

Tight end Jay Rome, an AJC Super 11 member and the No. 3 player in the state, committed to the Bulldogs over Alabama Thursday afternoon. Thursday evening, his wide receiver teammate Malcolm Mitchell, the state’s No. 6 player, joined Rome in tabbing the Bulldogs. He also picked the state school over Alabama.

“It’s a good idea,” Mitchell said of UGA’s “Dream Team” concept. “Jay going there and being a friend had a little bit of influence on me but it was based on what I wanted. That’s what it came down to. I had to do what I felt was right.”


UGA is looking to complete it's "Dream Team" by landing the #1 tailback in the nation in Isaiah Crowell out of Carver-Columbus High(GA) and defensive end/outside linebacker Ray Drew out of Thomas Country(GA). Rome specifically mentioned Crowell and Drew need to follow him to Athens. If they do it would mean Georgia landed 5 of the top 6 recruits in Georgia (Stephon Truitt is ND bound).

Mark Richt and his staff have a lot of work left to do to secure a top 5 class in the nation but if they can continue to win recruiting wars with the likes of Alabama and Florida to secure elite talent like Crowell and Drew then there is little doubt Richt will be buying himself more time with Georgia alumni and fans despite the losses on the field.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

BRETT FAVRE'S "WHAT SHOULD I DO?" COMMERCIAL



One simple answer for his question: DIE.

No more cock texts please. No more retirement talk. No more Wrangler commercials. Just go away and live on your god damn farm and leave us alone.

Signed,

Sports Nation

NEW YORKERS ARE WEIRD, PANTS ARE OPTIONAL IN THE SUBWAY



I gotta admit I'm kind of digging the no pants theme. I never wear pants when I blog. Hell to be completely honest I usually don't wear anything. But no pants on the subway in New York? That's fucking gross. The girls should at least have the decency to wear thongs. Only the ones in shape of course. New Yorkers always fucking up a good thing. I'm almost positive I saw Brian Cashman's ass on one of those shots. The Steinbrenners wear his pants.

Video HT: Extra Mustard

BLAKE GRIFFIN OBVIOUSLY BLOWS



Blake Griffin couldn't even get a double-double last night. His game sucks. Sure he throws the ball off the backboard to get a slam dunk (does he get an assist?) and he carries the Clippers to another victory but the guy obviously has no game. Look at this fucking ball hog! He's like Michael Jordan and just carries the whole team on his back. What a dick!



He's also only hitting 56% from behind the 3 point throw line. What a fucking loser!

STEPHON TUITT BACK TO NOTRE DAME!


48 hours ago five star defensive end Stephon Tuitt was a Notre Dame commitment. 24 hours ago he was a Georgia Tech commitment. And now? Apparently he is back to being a Notre Dame pledge after the Notre Dame staff led by Brian Kelly flew down to Atlanta to talk to his mom and Stephon.

The five-star defensive end from Monroe Area High School, who flipped from the Fighting Irish in order to commit to Georgia Tech on Tuesday, confirmed to the AJC late Wednesday night that he flipped back to Notre Dame. Elapsed time on the de-commit/re-commit: About 30 hours.

“What a day!” Tuitt said.

Tuitt said he had a change of heart after Notre Dame head coach Brian Kelly and several defensive coaches made an in-home visit Wednesday night.

“They just told the truth,” he said when asked what changed his mind. “They didn’t say anything negative about Georgia Tech or anything like that. They just told the truth about what Notre Dame could do for me and what I could do at Notre Dame..”

Tuitt said he “had a few questions I needed to get off my chest.” Asked what those questions were, he said, “just some little things and some big things. I had some questions about the class they have coming in and some about the school and some about the coaching staff. Things like that.”

Afterward, Tuitt said he and his mother re-affirmed his commitment to sign with Notre Dame on national signing day. Then he called Georgia Tech head coach Paul Johnson.

“It was terrible,” Tuitt said of that phone call. ‘He was disappointed. He said he knows it’s a business. I don’t think he was mad at me necessarily, just very disappointed. He’s a great coach and Georgia Tech has a great future. It’s just going to be without me.”

Asked whether there was any chance he might change his mind again, Tuitt said no. “I should be solid to signing day.”

Tuitt’s mother, Tamara Bartlett, was clearly a catalyst in the decision.

“I never changed my mind in the first place,” she said of her son de-committing to Notre Dame. “Stephon did. The reason he was wavering back and forth all boils down to him not wanting to hurt anybody’s feelings. He had developed relationships with all these coaches and didn’t want to disappoint them. But somebody’s going to have to be disappointed and today it’s Georgia Tech. Tomorrow it’s going to be Georgia Tech and the next day it’s going to Georgia Tech because recruiting stops now.”

For his part, Tuitt went out of his way to praise Georgia Tech and its football program.

“To be able to go to Notre Dame is just a special opportunity,” he said. “Georgia Tech is also a great school; that’s why I was second-guessing. I love Georgia Tech and their coaching staff. But this is a life decision.”


As you can tell this is far from over. Right now Notre Dame is in the lead with Georgia Tech trailing. It's the final lap. Can Tech pull off the miracle? At this point nobody knows. Not even Stephon Tuitt.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

SOCCER KICK FAIL



Way to go Dad! You just paralyzed your kid trying to Pele the ball to her. This is why my kids will never play soccer. It's too rough of a sport. Only rugby and bull riding for the Fairchild kids.

HOLD ME CLOSER TONY DANZA



Wait a god damn minute! The Elton John song is "Hold me Closer TINY DANCER?" I could have sworn all these years it was Tony Danza. Why else would Elton want to hold a dancer? He's still gay right? I'm so confused now.

THIS IS WHAT DEREK JETER WAKES UP TO EVERY OTHER MORNING: MINKA KELLY IN STOCKINGS




While A-Rod is banging Jeter's sloppy seconds Derek is hitting leadoff with actress Minka Kelly. These pictures from GQ show the Friday Night Lights temptress toying with her stockings and itchy shirt before frolicking in bed with Jeter. On the other days Jeter isn't waking up next to Minka he is face down in road beef. True story. I read it on the internet.

TEXAS AGREES TO 20-YEAR, $300 MILLION DEAL WITH ESPN


The Texas Longhorns got paid big time today. Texas and ESPN have come to an agreement to have an exclusive television contract for all things Longhorn sports for the next 20 years for a mere $300 million. Holy shit! Yeah, and these are to pay for "amateur student-athlete" expenses. If I am Notre Dame I look to renegotiate the NBC Contract right away.

AUSTIN, Texas (AP) — The University of Texas has reached a 20-year, $300 million deal with ESPN for a television network that will broadcast Longhorn sports and other content.
A news conference to formally announce the contract was scheduled for Wednesday afternoon. University spokesman Don Hale confirmed the contract details.
The deal includes Texas' licensing and marketing partner IMG, with more than 80 percent of revenue set to go to the university.
George Bodenheimer, president of ESPN Inc. and ABC Sports, called the network "a testament to the school's remarkable, tradition-rich success and widespread, devoted fan base."


So now the question is how and why is Texas still a part of the Big 12 Conference? Shouldn't they be an independent now because they most certainly aren't going to share their revenue with the rest of the conference? Makes you wonder. In the end the almighty dollar always wins out. We always knew that.

LAS VEGAS SPORTS BETTING LEGEND BILLY WALTERS ON 60 MINUTES



Billy Walters is just a good ole boy from Kentucky who has made a fortune on sports betting in Las Vegas. The guy is a hustler who knows how to make millions in a day just by betting on football and basketball games. He basically is the Michael Jordan of sports betting. He straight up dominates every year. The dude has a $20 million dollar jet and 7 homes around the world. Fucking shit! Truth be told I am jealous of Billy Walters. I would kill to live this guy's lifestyle.

JOSH SMITH WITH THE FILTHY DUNK OVER THE HEAT



Atlanta Hawks forward Josh Smith just gave Miami Heat's Joel Anthony a guest appearance on his next poster. Not only did Smith totally own Anthony last night with this fast break left handed slam he also helped me win some money last night as the Hawks won despite being 6 point dogs on the road. The Heat have now lost 4 in a row. Losers.

MISSISSIPPI STATE CHEERLEADER POSES FOR PLAYBOY, MIGHT BE KICKED OFF TEAM



FratHouseSports has the NSFW gallery of Mississippi State cheerleader Taylor Corley Playboy pictures that came out last month. Word is she got kicked off the Bulldog's cheerleading squad after the coaches found out about the pictures. Personally I just think Taylor was showing off her team spirit. What's wrong with showing her cowbells? I always thought it was a tradition in Starksville to shake them around for your team.

UPDATE: SportsByBrooks.com has found out Corley will NOT be suspended from the cheerleading squad because she did not identify herself as a student or a cheerleader for Mississippi State. Awesome!



VENUS WILLIAMS SPORTING THE WAFFLE HOUSE TOP DOWN UNDER



After staring at this picture for five seconds I got a major craving for the All-Star Special at WAHO. Just pour some syrup on Venus Williams, add a little bit of hashbrowns on the side and some scrambled eggs and I would eat her up. Venus has never looked so yummy. I think I see some chocolate chips too.

Image via CosbySweaters

LAURENCE MARONEY'S MUG SHOT



Denver Broncos running back Laurence Maroney was arrested Monday for drugs and guns charges in none other than the crime capital of the world: St. Louis, MO. Shocker right? You gotta love the mug shot. For a second I thought it was Whoopi Goldberg. Even has the little white poking out of the collar like a nun.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

ROB LOWE GOES NUTS



Looks funny but I will probably not watch "Parks and Recreation." Why? Because I'm fucking lazy and I'd rather drink and masturbate on Thursdays. Duh!

SCARY SNOW PENISES ROCK SMALL TOWN

BROOKLYN DECKER IS FUN TO LOOK AT




I'm still not going to pay $12 to go see her in the newest Adam Sandler bomb of a movie but I don't mind looking at these new Esquire pictures of her. It's only a matter of time before Brooklyn Decker ditches the tennis geek she's with now and upgrades to the blogger geek. Don't worry Brooklyn...I'll keep it our dirty little secret you vixen you.

Images via WWTDD

NOTRE DAME LOSES 5 STAR RECRUIT STEPHON TUITT TO GEORGIA TECH


Well as quickly as the Irish gained a recruit in Chase Hounshell they lost their biggest recruit today when 5 star defensive end Stephon Tuitt called Brian Kelly and told him and his staff he would be staying local and head to Georgia Tech.

Georgia Tech, led by recruiting coordinator Andy McCollum, pulled off the biggest last-minute switch in Yellow Jacket recruiting history on Tuesday afternoon.

McCollum has been working newly minted five-star defensive end Stephon Tuitt for years, and all that hard work finally has paid off.

Tuitt called Notre Dame head coach Brian Kelly and decommitted from the Irish. He has committed to Georgia Tech and head coach Paul Johnson. Monroe Area head coach Matt Fligg confirmed the switch.

"We talked a lot the last two or three days, and I told Stephon he needed to do what was best for him. The big hold up was he didn't want to be known as a decommitter," Fligg said. "This afternoon we called Notre Dame together and let them know that he is no longer committed there. Then we called head coach Paul Johnson and informed him Stephon would be a Yellow Jacket."


Tuitt was worked over into flipping to Georgia Tech thanks to high school teammate Demontevious Smith who just recently received his first major offer this past week from none other than Georgia Tech. Smith convinced Tuitt that staying local would be in his best interest and that playing in Al Groh's defense would suit him well. Tuitt is the most highly regarded prospect to commit to Georgia Tech in the past 30 years. He is the #1 prospect in the state of Georgia and also is rated the #2 defensive end in all the country.

Groh's defense last year was horrific so expect Tuitt to start right away. Pretty much as soon as he steps foot on campus he will be their best player. Props go to coach Paul Johnson and his staff for getting his high school buddy to get him to switch. All is fair in love and recruiting.

NOTRE DAME STEALS ONE FROM FLORIDA, LANDS CHASE HOUNSHELL



Talk about a reversal of fortune for two programs. Back when Charlie Weis was coaching Notre Dame Urban Meyer would routinely steal recruits from the Fighting Irish at the last minute (Justin Trattou, Omar Hunter). It was a matter of routine for Urban to tear out the hearts of Notre Dame recruiting fans and eat it. You pretty much expected it.

Moving along to the present we now have Notre Dame stealing Florida recruits. Massive offensive tackle Chase Hounshell had been committed to the Gators for over 6 months but all it took was an in-home visit from head coach Brian Kelly and position coach Ed Warinner just a day after Will Muschamp and his Gator crew visited to get the kid to flip. In other words Kelly and his staff are just straight up stealing house money at this point.

If you are a Gator fan you should be worried about Muschamp and Weis coaching your team. Neither one of them has proven themselves as a head coach and it appears recruits are starting to take notice too. Meanwhile Kelly and his staff continue to get top notch prospects and convince them to either flip to them or stay committed. It's probably because Kelly is a proven winner who no matter what kind of talent he had on his roster he would continue to win. If you are a Notre Dame fan you shouldn't be on the fence anymore with Kelly as the coach. He knows what he is doing. If you are Gator fan I would be really worried.

Karma is a bitch.

Monday, January 17, 2011

PEE WEE HERMAN IS A BAD DRUNK



I know you are but what am I?

CAL RIPKEN JR TO BE BALTIMORE ORIOLES OWNER IN TWO YEARS?


Since football season is pretty much over for me I figured I would dive into some baseball rumors. Former ESPN sports commentator and journalist Roy Firestone (yes...the guy who made Rod Tidwell cry) is a die hard Baltimore Orioles fan and had this juicy rumor of Cal Ripken Jr. taking ownership in two years from Peter Angelos...

Im not identifying the person. But at an awards dinner I presented last night honoring Tom Seaver, Brooks Robinson, Joe Garagiola, Bob Uecker, and others, I had a lengthy conversation with a highly"plugged in" individual(NOT AN ORIOLE OR EX ORIOLE).This person(whom any baseball fan would know) told me that Peter Angelos intends to sell the Orioles in two years to a group headed by Cal Ripken Jr. I have NO CONFIRMATION nor do I have any personal insight. I don't even know if Cal would even dignify the comment with an answer. All I know is that this person(not a scribe either) is highly credible and had alot of details. I've heard this suggestion before, and many have talked about this. But this is the first time Ive heard a baseball figure tell me that this is going to happen. Just thought youd like to know.


Firestone posted this on OriolesHangout.com and for the love of God I hope it happens. Since Peter Angelos bought majority ownership of the Baltimore Orioles back in 1993 for $173 million the team has made only 2 playoff appearances. The once proud franchise who relied on great starting pitching, good defense, and the three-run homer have become the laughingstock of the AL East under the grips of Angelos. Sports Illustrated has rated him the worst owner in all of the Majors. As an Orioles fan I would completely agree. Camden Yards has become a ghost town under his ownership despite it being one of the best ballparks in the game. People don't go to the games anymore because they don't want to support the franchise mainly because of the way Angelos has run them into the ground. Angelos is public enemy #1 in Baltimore.

Ripken on the other hand is a state treasure. He's an icon. A legend. A local boy who won a World Series and kept the Orioles on the map despite Angelos. He would be the perfect owner for the only team he has ever known. He grew up playing "the Oriole Way" under his dad who was a long time coach for his hometown team. Ripken knows baseball and with him being an owner it would put his face back on the franchise and destroy the totalitarian drowning grip of Angelos' dead hands.

It almost sounds too good to be true. One can only pray the information Firestone got is in fact correct. It's something myself, Eddie, Cal, and the rest of the Orioles fanbase and franchise could drink to forever.